We Learn

Because he can be very inconsiderate, insensitive and fucking entitle, I had an argument with David on Wednesday night… Obviously I lost my cool because I don’t have to deal with that. I’m a nice guy, but I give what I get, so I gave him shit. He fired back with predictable accusations…

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We are cool now… because he doesn’t like my cold blooded bitch ways, which funny enough is how he forces me to be.

You know, it’s really interesting how each of my long-term relationships made me experience new things, and made me discover sides of me I didn’t know I have.

  1. With Hubby I experienced joy and overwhelm. He always brought out the best in me.
  2. Bunny woke up my hyper sexuality and my fighter side. Which was the only way to deal with him in those days.
  3. Jaden made me realistic and strong. Having a long distance relationship took all my patience, trust and also taught me when to say ENOUGH.
  4. Justin opened my mind and made understood that monogamy and faithfulness are two different things.
  5. Joseph showed me love again, yet he turned me uncontrollably aggressive with his constant bad attitude.

And David… with David I’m experiencing something I never did before…psychological endurance, because that’s what sharing your guy does.

Although, not my ideal, I decided to give it a go for the sake of experience. However, it’s not working smoothly and it’s fucking me up in the head. I know, I gave him another chance, but he’s not cooperating to improve it.

Since I know myself very well, yesterday I decided to find him a serious replacement. I’m kind of discouraged. I’m a monogamous guy by nature and I need a one-on-one relationship. 

That been said, I already have a date tonight, and another one tomorrow night. I like both guys (Patrick A and Connor) both my type inside out… It’s going to be hard to chose one.

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I guess my relationship with David is the best example of “Don’t blame the player, blame the game”.

Long story short, we learn every day, and what I learnt with David is that I’m unable to share my guy. For that reason, it’s matter of time before he becomes a souvenir. For enough reasons, for prevention, and by his own actions because I really wanted and I really tried to take him seriously.

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