“Soft Sensuality,” And “Poetic Cadence”

nightcrumbs011016-500x438Feeling perhaps a bit defensive at the approximately zero celebrities who have signed on to celebrate Donald Trump’s procession to the presidency, the Trump campaign cleared up a few misconceptions about what form his inauguration will take. From the details provided, I can only presume his swearing in will take place inside the sauna of a Russian bathhouse.

Inaugural planner Tom Barrack told pool reporters Tuesday that unlike Obama’s star-studded inauguration, Trump’s event won’t feature any celebrities because Trump is “the greatest celebrity in the world.” He also promised a “soft sensuality,” and a “poetic cadence”.

“What we’ve done instead of trying to surround him with what people consider A-listers is we are going to surround him with the soft sensuality of the place. It’s a much more poetic cadence than having a circus-like celebration that’s a coronation,” Barrack said. “That’s the way this president-elect wanted it. I think it will be contribute. It will be beautiful. The cadence of it is going to be ‘let me get back to work

Translation: He wanted a circus more than anything in the world. He wanted a circus and his name in lights and all the Hollywood Popular Kids coming to applaud him and throw rose petals at his bloated feet. He even wanted a crown. He wanted this to be the culmination of his whole gold-plated life. But all he could get was Scott Baio and a reluctant pack of singing Mormons. So he’s playing the Sour Grapes card, and hoping you won’t notice.

But the real question is: 

WHY IS THE WORD SENSUALITY USED TO DESCRIBE A PRESIDENTIAL INAUGURATION FOR THE MOST REPULSIVE MAN ALIVE? 

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What a joke!

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