Phases & Flashback Chapter II: PRUDENT

To continue my previous post…

10 years later, after Hubby and Bunny I was not longer the same.

Now older and experienced I never thought to fall in love again. But I did, and very deep. However, my approach to relationships changed. I was less impetuous giving my feelings away, I was prudent, had conditions and even many restrictions after my next partner…

Jaden: As most of all my partners, we also fell in love the moment we met. Our time together was 95% positive, lots of great memories. He loved music and used to post lots of Bruno Mars and assorted pop songs of the time on my Facebook wall. Yet the song below (I avoided for years) always reminds me of him ’cause it was the last he played on repeat at home.

 
Aside from all the stuff I mentioned before, the main reasons of the deterioration of our relationship was the fact that Jaden started to play with fire on my back… 

The final episode of our story was very unexpected and damaged our friendship beyond repair.

Reason abandoned me with his behaviour, and he let me fall. None of my relationships (previous or future) affected me the way this one did. 

 

Before Jaden I could count the guys I had in my bed with one hand. After him, that me was also history.


Joseph: We were twin-flames and ADDICTED to each other, but we had a toxic almost sadomasochistic relationship. He was fire and I was gasoline. Yet, we truly loved each other despite our explosions.

Joseph had many qualities that many times were overshadowed by his bad attitude, attitude I blame myself for because (Jaden left me broken) I couldn’t give Joseph that tender side he expected from me.

I was an animal when we met, and he was very inexperienced. But that attracted like a magnet both of us.

He introduced me to many bands, but this below makes me think of him all the time. Probably because… We lost our way

Sex with all my partners was always spectacular, but every second with Joseph was unforgettable. Every inch of him was a greatest moment.

We used to fuck and fight, only to fuck again… And that was the unhealthy pathology of our vicious bond. However, in the end I stopped arguing and accepted our story the way it was, only for him to leave.

My only remorse in our relationship was not have shown him how much he meant to me. I miss him still and always will.

Chapter III… Stay tuned.

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