Nobody Wanted A White Trash Blowjob

Earlier this month, bewigged American reality television Kim Zolciak lowered the “cool mom” archetype to new depths by publicly offering her daughter’s oral flavors so her son Kash could meet John Legend. Yes, that’s right. So THE SON could meet John Legend.

It was 20-year-old Brielle Biermann who would have been strapping on the knee pads in exchange for goods and services for SOMEONE ELSE.

Kim’s not exactly the most feminist pimp around, huh? John’s wife Chrissy Teigen saved Brielle from her human-trafficking mother by saying that there was no need for beej.

The Zolciak-Biermann clan made it backstage to meet John without anyone having to spit or swallow… Heartwarming!

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