Tag Archives: Can You Not?

Mother defends child from crazy crack addict

Lindsay Lohan did a crazy 10-minute long video on Instagram Live of herself in Moscow where she chatted up a homeless family, offered them a free night in a hotel, and then snapped and accused them (in both English and fake Arabic?) of trafficking their children. And then she tried to grab the kids away!

The mom wasn’t having it and removed Lohan from her sight (much like Hollywood did). Except she used her fists. 

Fun fact about the Arabic that Lindsay Lohan is employing: Twitter user Abdi helpfully informs us that the words Lohan is speaking came straight from the back cover of Rosetta Stone: Broken Arabic.

Usually I would say to get someone help but how many chances has she had? How many people have tried to help her? Just lock her up before she hurts someone.

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Nagini is that you?

Have you seen that viral video of Trump hissing? It’s really weird.

But it kinda makes more sense (but still weird) if you see the full video. Still, it’s a lot more fun for the imagination to think he’s a reptile cursed in that body.

I want to believe he’s actually Nagini and we’re all waiting for fate to happen.

On the other hand, I like how saying “thank you” looks so painful on him.

He contorts his whole face just to get it out. 

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Theatrics

Hurricane Florence has taken several lives and left almost a million people without power. It’s tragic and dramatic on its own, but while reporting from Wilmington, North Carolina during the hurricane, Weather Channel reporter Mike Seidel decided to bring more drama…

He appeared to be bravely reporting while being buffeted by torrential rain and winds gusting at a hundred-something MPH that wanted to blow him away to the afterworld.

However, it looks like Mike is somewhat of a meteorological drama queen.

While Mike was acting like he was Helen Hunt in Twister, two dudes calmly walked by behind him, seemingly untroubled by the inclement weather.

It sort of diluted the moment.

A helpful PHD on Twitter also took the time to explain to us laypeople that, if you’re really gunning for a crown, you want to remember which way the wind is blowing.

Anyhow, my prayers are with those who are suffering this hurricane. Please stay safe.

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Trailer Of A Mess

When the serial rebooters known as Netflix shared the first pictures from the She-Ra reboot, I got up out of my chair, walked to the nearest wall, and did an open-mouthed cry wall slide over those evil butcherers transforming the 80s goddess of mythological glamour into a tragic mess.

But after I pulled myself up off the floor and whispered, “You’re my only She-Ra,” into my She-Ra doll’s head, I told myself that the She-Ra reboot isn’t for me, but for the children of today, and now the children of today got their first look at their Baby She-Ra in action.

The teaser trailer shows Sailor Moon’s white second cousin (aka the new Adora a.k.a. She-Ra) getting lured into the forest by a stranger’s voice…

Somebody should really tell Adora that if a strange voice tries to lure you into the forest, run the opposite way and call the cops!!

To me, it still looks like anime as drawn by the worst student in a high school animation class. With that being said, I am not watching Fetus-Ra, because I am not a damn kid. But mostly, because Netflix is not making any justice the iconic cartoon.

She-Ra is supposed to be woman, not a girl. And should be looking like this:

One word: MEH!

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Pedo Got Hurt

It appears there are two possible ways to react if you’re a famous American politician and have recently found yourself humiliated at the hands of Sacha Baron Cohen on his Showtime series Who Is America?

If you’re Georgia Republican state Rep. Jason Spencer, you might pull up your pants and resign in an attempt to save what little shred of dignity you might have left.

If you’re Sarah Palin, you would throw an internet tantrum and claim you were duped.

Former Chief Justice of the Supreme Court of Alabama (and creep) Roy Moore looked like a fool on Who Is America? in a segment involving a fake pedophile detector, and now he’s suing for $95 million.

Last year, Roy Moore became a household name when four women came forward during Roy’s bid to run for Alabama senate, and accused him of hitting on them when they were underage girls (Roy lost to the Democratic candidate).

As you can probably guess before even hitting play on this video, Erran’s pervert-wand beeped like crazy when it came near Roy Moore.

Skip to the 2:46 mark to watch Roy look extremely uncomfortable before walking out of the interview.

How stupid do you need to be to believe in a pedo-detector? The fallout of the Trump administration is showing us just how incredibly stupid some of those people in office are.

Dupe them via their own hubris and stupidity and suddenly THEIR hurt feelings are important enough to warrant everything. 

I’m not a fan of Sacha Baron Cohen, but he’s crazy enough to fool those fools.

That said, good luck with that you disgusting piece of shit!

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Kanye Kardashian doesn’t care about black People

Earlier this month, Kanye West was on Jimmy Kimmel Live!  where he talked about a lot of shit. 

Most of what he said was the generic Kanye non-sensical garbage: stupid philosophical questions with no basis in reality, how amazing he is at design *barfs*  his admiration of Donald Trump *uncontrollably vomits* etc.

But Kanye was stumped when asked about Trump:

“You so famously and so powerfully said, ‘George Bush doesn’t care about black people’. It makes me wonder what makes you think that Donald Trump does, or any people at all?”

Kim’s bitch stared at the ceiling hoping for an answer. When one didn’t descend and enter his righteous mind, Jimmy moved on to commercial.

Well, Kanye finally had enough time to think of his answer (a whole month) and he was ready to talk about it on 107.5 WGCI in Chicago. However, if you’re looking for a sensible answer from Kanye West, you are looking in the wrong place.

Kanye Kardashian said this about Trump:

“I feel that [Trump] cares about the way black people feel about him, and he would like for black people to like him like they did when he was cool in the rap songs and all this.”

Kanye continued by suggesting that Trump will “do the things that are necessary” to support the black community because:

“…he’s got an ego like all the rest of us, and he wants to be the greatest president, and he knows that he can’t be the greatest president without the acceptance of the black community.”

Realistically he can’t be the greatest president for a few reasons, just off the top of my head: the whole Mexicans are rapists thing, the “Grab em by the pussy” thing, that whole children separation thing, calling Omarosa a dog… IDK maybe I’m missing a few…

I guess no one has explained to Kanye that nobody on this planet except for Narcissus has the same kind of ego as he or Donald Trump because they’re pretty much are twins in delusion.

In fact, has anyone done any studies on how many brain cells a human loses when reading a Kanye or Trump tweet?

I also need to know where Kanye is getting his political information because he seems to think that he has some kind of perspective or insight into these topics?

He probably just follows that Blacks For Trump guy on Twitter.

Anyway, I don’t get why people keep asking Kanye about anything?

Dude needs intensive therapy and not interviews. But I guess Americans can’t recognise mentally deranged individuals. 

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Truth isn’t truth…

Sorry for the lack of updates, I’ve been a bit busy… Anyhow, let’s catch up.

So last Sunday Rudy Giuliani, speaking as a lawyer clown for Donald Trump, told “Truth isn’t truth,”to Chuck Todd on NBC’s “Meet the Press.”

Bitch said: 

“When you tell me that, you know, he should testify because he’s going to tell the truth and he shouldn’t worry, well that’s so silly because it’s somebody’s version of the truth. Not the truth,” Giuliani told Todd. “Truth is truth,” Todd responded. “No, it isn’t truth,” Giuliani said. “Truth isn’t truth.”

So this clown is intentionally trying to create some new world of relative factuality?

Wednesday isn’t Wednesday. The sky is not blue. Water isn’t wet. 

“Truth isn’t truth” fits nicely in the same solar system as alternative facts.

As truth is not truth. Horizontal stripes ARE slimming.

You know, I’ve been watching episodes of Tiny Toon Adventures just to find some sanity.

This shit is insane, the Trump administration job is to confuse the fragile minds.

Can they just go away?

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