Tag Archives: Do You Need Some Attention?

Stupidity knows No Bounds

In case you didn’t already know that cementing your head in a microwave is a really fucking shit-brained idea unless you want to die a slow, painful death, I am here to tell you that cementing your head in a microwave is a really fucking shit-brained idea unless you want to die a slow, painful death.

A YouTube prankster (read: IDIOT) came up with a really creatively dumb way to waste a microwave and some cement…

HuffPo says that Jay Swingler, a 22-year-old prankster from the town of Wolverhampton in England, recorded a Darwin Award-worthy stunt for the YouTube channel TGFBro that involved him trying to make a cement mold of his face.

Jay wrapped a plastic bag around his head (genius move #1), stuck a little tube in his mouth so he could breathe (genius move #2), put his head in a microwave (genius move #3) and let a fellow bro pour cement into the microwave (genius move #4). Weirdly enough, it’s kind of hard to pull your head out of a microwave filled with hardened concrete.

That mafia torture technique went south real fast!!

Jay’s douchebros spent 90 minutes trying to get his head out of the microwave, and they eventually had to call for help. West Midlands Fire Service spent an hour freeing Jay’s head from that concrete tomb of death.

They weren’t happy about it:

Jay is fine and his head didn’t suffer any kind of damage (although, he may have been brain dead while thinking up this stunt). Sure Jay’s bros could’ve pulled his head off of his neck while trying to get him out of that microwave and he could’ve suffocated to death, but it was all worth it, because that video has gotten over 1 million views so far…

Otherwise he would have died for real… of embarrassment!!

Jokes aside, there’s nothing funny about playing with your life. The need for likes and attention online is alarming, not to mention fucking retarded!

They should have just set that stupid bitch to “popcorn” and let it go. 

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Trudeau For Attitude

Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has made history posing for the cover of Attitude Magazine.

He is the first international leader to appear on the cover of an International LGBT magazine.

Trudeau tells Attitude: “The LGBT+ community has become emblematic of the fight for human rights. The fact that so many people have gone for so long feeling that they had to be ashamed, or hide something about their core identity to fit into society is a lesson for everyone to push against.”

Trudeau’s appearance on the cover of Attitude comes after he gave an apology to members of the LGBT community who were treated unjustly by the Canadian government during the Cold War.

Oh well, I may not be a Trudeau fan-girl, but at least he’s an empathetic man. 

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So Much Denial

MassResistance is a hate group of out and proud homophobes who I guess believe that God hates fags, but LOVES flags!

A week ago, they held their Teens4Truth conference in Dallas to teach the youngins’ the dangers of the “gay agenda,” but those bigoted messes, opened with a routine that could easily be the official dance of the “gay agenda.”

The video starts out with some Family Dollar Fred Phelps introducing the opening act and saying that he has no idea what the audience is about to experience… (Uh huh… ) I hope that Family Dollar Fred Phelps clamped his gay-hating puffy ass ring together with an industrial-strength bag clip, because this fabulous performance swirled out by the Anti-Gay Queen of Anti-Gay Flag Dances can make even the deadest of b-holes pucker.

While dressed like a business casual Friday dad, Derek flutters onto the stage like a majestic homo butterfly, and you can tell he really feels the lyric, “Ride ’em down, one by one.” That line isn’t only a lyric in a song from an anti-gay flag dance, it’s also a line screamed at the lone bottom at a gay orgy.

Derek and his amazingly gay technicolor dreamwings make the gay angels squirt out giant tears of pure glitter as he flutters up a beautiful gay storm.

The weird thing about this performance is that the stage wasn’t crashed by a bunch of RuPaul’s Drag Race queens, because this is a lip sync for your life moment.

Let your gay flags fly, Derek!!

Seriously, those dumb homophobes… SO MUCH DENIAL!!!

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Trying TOO Hard…

I remember seeing the video clip of The Rolling Stones “Everybody Seen My Baby” back in the 90’s, with a young unknown Angelina Jolie in it and instantly fell in love with her beauty. But an Iranian Angeloonie has taken her love of Angelina a bit (read: fucking well past) further than that.

Unilad claims 19-year-old Sahar Tabar has gone through FIFTY surgeries to look like Jesus kinder sister (St. Angie) and well…

I don’t know what that is but I know its not good.

She’s admitted she “would do anything” to look like Angie, so I assume she filed adoption papers for 900 children to complete the look.

Some people claim the look can no way be the result of surgeries because she’s 19, they say it looks more prosthetic and Photoshop… Clearly these people haven’t met the Kardashians! Bitch looks like a rejected extra from the Walking Dead.

In fact her look says Corpse Bride more than Angelina Jolie.

I’m gonna pretend this is just an enormous joke and totally not real. 

Otherwise my brain won’t handle it.

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Speaking Of Nazis…

The New York Times regrets “normalizing” Nazi profile.

From the national editor of the NYT:

Whatever our goal, a lot of readers found the story offensive, with many seizing on the idea we were normalizing neo-Nazi views and behavior. “How to normalize Nazis 101!” one reader wrote on Twitter. “I’m both shocked and disgusted by this article,” wrote another. “Attempting to ‘normalize’ white supremacist groups – should Never have been printed!”

Our reporter and his editors agonized over the tone and content of the article. The point of the story was not to normalize anything but to describe the degree to which hate and extremism have become far more normal in American life than many of us want to think.

We regret the degree to which the piece offended so many readers. We recognize that people can disagree on how best to tell a disagreeable story. What we think is indisputable, though, is the need to shed more light, not less, on the most extreme corners of American life and the people who inhabit them.

That’s what the story, however imperfectly, tried to do.

The original piece is here.

Yeah… The problem is that it WASN’T even neutral!

They’d just quoted the ignorant Trump-loving jerk saying things like “Jews control the media” or “Hitler was actually pretty chill towards gays” not fucking bother to print an actual fact in the article correcting that nonsense.

All that while praising the killing of a protester during the embarrassing Charlottesville Nazi march some months ago.

The best possible interpretation is that they thought his opinions were self-evidently bullshit, but that just doesn’t fly when a significant portion of Americans believes that garbage.

Shine a light on them, yes. Make them look normal, NO! 

We had a war about this already. FAIL big time!

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Pro-ISIS Group Threaten 2018 World Cup

Wafa Media Foundation, a pro-Islamic State (ISIS) group, have released a poster threatening to bring terror to the 2018 FIFA World Cup in Russia that features an image of Barcelona and Argentina star LIONEL MESSI crying blood.

The 2018 World Cup will be played across 11 cities in Russia from June 14 to July 15, when the final will be played at the Luzhniki Stadium in Moscow.

Now, I guess those terrorist jerks haven’t realised that football (soccer) is the sport king and this is one way to unite the whole world against them.

Also, Russians do not prat around with these people like the West.

Do a Russian down, and you will come second! So, well done bastards.

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Halloween Underwear Charades

Cheap Undies is the place to go for designer underwear for cheap prices.

They’ll cover your butt for less, and to celebrate Halloween, director Brad Hammer enlisted a bunch of models for a cliché promo video because, gay!

Halloween is the most fun time of year hands down.

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