Archives for posts with tag: Do You Need Some Attention?

Whoever said dreams never come true needs to be slapped across the face with a stale burrito. Because Taco Bell Canada has decided to spice up everyone’s life by constructing a billboard that dispenses golden showers of gross delicious, gooey nacho cheese.

The billboard, known in fancy dining circles as the “Cheesiest Billboard” (fire the marketing team immediately, please) urges foodies to step up and bring whatever snack they desire to be slathered in glorious, processed cheesy abomination deliciousness.

But don’t get too excited though because the Cheesiest Billboard will only be on display on Saturday, January 19 from 11:30am-2:30pm at the Taco Bell flagship store in Toronto. So this obviously means you need to call out from work on Friday January 18 to prepare yourself for the yellow bukkake fest that will be Nacho Cheese Mania ’19 in Toronto.

And just to be on the safe side make sure you take that Monday off as well since you’ll probably spend the rest of that weekend in the washroom expelling those nacho demons from your body.

Jokes aside, that is the most American thing ever. How is it in Canada?!?

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More than five years after she collaborated with R. Kelly on a song titled “Do What U Want (With My Body),” Lady Gaga has issued an apology on her decision to work with Kelly, after hearing the “absolutely horrifying and indefensible” allegations against him…

Part of me is like “REALLY?! Now?! Are you kidding me.” But I’m also glad she at least said something.

R. Kelly penchant for underage girls was known by absolutely everyone, since FOREVER! And she was very aware of it.

Also, that video was directed by Terry Richardson, another well known sexual predator she worked regularly with.

This is why for many years I found Gaga fake. While claiming being a victim of sexual assault she had no issues working with two perverts.

Anyhow although I believe this is damage control pure and simple (the Oscars are coming) an apology is the right thing to do.

The Golden Globes red carpet was full of celebrities last night, but there was only one true star… That’s the FIJI Water girl, who dazzled the internet with a rather strong commitment to the art of blatant promotion.

While many strong-armed employees have carried trays of bottled water in Hollywood before, few can match the passion and the intensity of one promotional Canadian staffer for FIJI Water, who managed to PHOTOBOMB relentlessly during the award ceremony’s red carpet event on Sunday.

Look at her, bottles at the ready, staring into the camera. 

She was everywhere, and you could only wish for this level of commitment in your life.

This is beyond disappointing.

Ellen DeGeneres, one of the most famous and powerful queer people in the world, has extended herself mightily to exonerate Kevin Hart for his past homophobia, seeming to overlook the fact that he claims to have apologised back in the day (but didn’t) and that he is still extremely defensive, not apologetic.

On her show, he said that he’s apologised and admitted that those tweets were wrong and felt that stepping down from the hosting gig was the right thing to do because he didn’t want to take any attention away from the nominees. That’s when Ellen, who looked like she was minutes away from putting her hand up to his mouth and saying “I’mma let you finish” the entire time, finally had a chance to add her two cents.

“What we’re going to get to see on stage with you hosting the Oscars is sophistication, class, hilarity and you growing as a person,” she said. “Because most people would say, ‘I’m walking away … ’ For you to be the bigger man, for you to say I understand …and to not pay attention. There are so many haters out there. Whatever is going on in the internet, don’t pay attention to them. That’s a small group of people being very, very loud. We are a huge group of people who love you and want to see you host the Oscars.”

Really Ellen? Who is WE? Such a fucking victim he is!

This wasn’t some lame joke you could make a free speech argument out of, this was him saying he would hit his child if he sees them playing with dolls. Ignoring the homophobia (which BTW, seriously, Ellen, you of all people?) this was not a comedian in their “stage persona” attempting being funny or controversial. This was pure, unfiltered him bragging about threatening violence against another human being.

HE IS NOT FUNNY!

In yesterday’s Washington Post: Who Died and Made Ellen the Gay Pope?, appropriately bashing her for trying to speak for an entire community, to grant absolution she has no right to grant.

So…. Kathy Griffin’s comedy is “too mean” and precludes her from appearing on Ellen, but she’ll have on homophobe Hart and even advocate for him? What a fraud.

I’m all for second chances, but find Ellen’s hypocrisy in this instance to be pretty blatant.

And also, nobody wants to see a talentless runt host that shit!

9.2 million people watched the acid-trip furries karaoke porn fantasy that is The Masked Singer.

I too watched that Lisa Frank fever dream online, and so it’s nice knowing that I probably wasn’t alone in thinking that the annoying panellists (except QUEEN Nicole Scherzinger) should’ve been wearing a mask too.

Specifically masks over their mouths for making the most stupid guesses when they probably know who the Masked Singer is.

But then again, people probably weren’t thinking that because they were too busy fapping at that huge PeaCOCK!!

Sick fucks! 

On New Year’s Eve in NYC, Madonna performed a surprise set at the legendary Stonewall Inn and she brought two guests with her:

  1. Her 13-year-old son David Banda 
  2. Her NEW ASS!!

I’m surprised the cops didn’t raid the Stonewall and arrest Madonna for stealing the ball from the top of Times Square and shoving it into the back of her pants. Yes, that’s just how awful that shit looked.

This is not the first time she shows that abomination, she did it few years ago because for some reason she thinks she looks good.

… Oh Madge!

I seriously don’t know this person, I’d rather just remember the Madonna from the 80’s and 90’s… This caricature, this wannabe Kardashian…

I don’t even know who she is! 

Unsurprisingly, the very-religious Justin Bieber went the religious route with his newest tattoo choice and got the word Grace tattooed just above his eyebrow, which is better than getting the word Holy over his butt crack like he first thought.

But on a positive note, at least the Jesus tattoo on his leg has another reason to throw a “bitch, please” eye roll. 

Tattoo artist Jon Boy rang in the New Year by getting some cheap publicity and posted a picture of Canada’s disgrace new facial ink to his Instagram page with a very long-winded statement about how people with difficult lives–like the MEGA RICH brat from Ontario inspire him, and more blah! 

Really, I also wish I had a “difficult life” with millions on my bank account.

This Instagram post may be sponsored by Febreze since you’ll want shove a bottle up your nose like poppers after taking in the dirty scabs and ear smegma scent of Bieber.

Anyway, that tattoo barely looks like it says Grace.

If you didn’t tell me it said Grace I would have read GROSS!