No Intimacy

You know… I had sexmates between serious relationships in the past, but it’s the first time I feel a fuckfriend is just that.

The difference between Tomy and any of my previous sexmates is
that unlike the rest, we don’t have intimacy.

We only fuck feeling free.

While I’ve always treated the other guys affectionately and caring, I cannot do those things with Tomy. He’s a straight guy who likes to fuck guys like me (smooth virgins *ahem* ) for pleasure but not by “nature.”

It’s not on him to show softness to another guy.

Although it doesn’t really bother me, I find it peculiar’cause I love to analyse people’s mind. See, in my head this so called “straight-curious” are bisexuals in denial, but there’s something different…

I’ve been with bisexual and they can be affectionate, but not very wild. While straight-curious can be very wild, but not affectionate.

I believe the kinkiness of the curious rely on the pleasure for the “forbidden” and fetish to dominate… which I totally approve.

Anyway so far so good, but cannot rely on Tomy 100%. And that’s why I already have plan A, B and… Z! But more of that soon. For now, I’d better go to bed. Tomy left few minutes ago and I really need some rest. 

Phases & Flashback Chapter IV: EAGER

Still on the subject of my previous post…

During my relationship with PatrickA I was already somebody else, but by the end, my sexual role (I’ve been the top all my life) started to change. Unlike any of my previous lovers, PatrickA was taller and more muscular than me. He was not my usual twink, he was a jock!

So, I was not only attracted by his incredible ass but also by his arms, chest, and every manly piece of him.

Although I never fantasised to have his dick inside (he was 100% bottom,) one time he tried to fuck me ’cause he liked my ass. After that episode, I started considering the idea… And one day, the Sex Gods sent my next boyfriend …

Xavier: Our relationship was sexy & sweet.

Xavier is a very affectionate guy, patient and of peaceful nature. And his selfless personality and hotness made me fell in love with him. Before meeting I knew he was versatile, but he never really attracted me as a bottom. To my eyes he was a hot top (taller, hairy, hung) and I was willing to explore. Even though I never expected anything, we clicked instantly and dated from that moment. 

I experienced many new things with Xavier and not only sexually (my first top,) but also emotionally. He was the first guy that made me feel he was taking care of me, and not me of him. I was always eager to please him.

Too many songs made think of him, mostly pop starlets. He made me feel like this, and sometimes also like this.  But this below was one of his favourite songs back then, and also the last we danced together in a club.


He made me explore another side of me, and although I’ve been with dozens of guys after him, I no longer know if I’d ever take someone as serious again. I still belong somehow to him.

One night lying in bed post-coitus I introduced him the song below, before he fucks me again. So, it’s an awesome souvenir.

I’m sure my phases are not over yet.

But like that song says…  Let’s take our time, we don’t need to run.

Writer’s Block No More

Sorry for the lack of updates I’ve got bit of writer’s block, but also I’ve been catching up with my sex life these days.

Since Randy is on vacations (my regular fuckfriend,) I got him a replacement. In this case under the form of a straight guy.

To the left to the left…

Lately I have plenty of “straight” guys wanting a piece of me… And I’m not talking about the thirsty horn dogs from Whisper (totally a hookup app) who get all excited whenever I post anything:

So, my new sexmate is a 20 yo straight guy. And like most of my gay guys, he’s very hot!

Tomy is very handsome, beautiful body, not very tall but what he lacks in height he makes up with a hard 8″ cock. But aside from his physical appearance, what I like about him is his shameless attitude.

He has zero taboos and loves to communicate.

Awesome qualities in my book!

Anyway, I’m alive an well.  I was just getting the right amount of inspiration… In other words he just fucked me again and left around 1:20 AM. So, I’m fully awake and motivated!

The lengths one has to go to fix it’s writer’s block.

Phases & Flashback Chapter III: CARELESS

Here’s the next chapter of my previous post…

Between Jaden & Joseph another 5 years went by, and I started to feel my age. Although, looking fine on the outside I no longer had the stamina of my prime years, when I was capable to fuck and cum 6 times in one night. Yet frustrating, I still was capable to give my partners a good time.

From Bunny, my partners got younger. But after Jaden, barely legal.

Joseph was 18 when we met, David 19, PatrickA 19 and the oldest of my many fuckfriend before or after them 21. A new generation of independent guys with hot bodies, extreme open mentality, zero shame and zero taboos. And all after me, ’cause I’ve never hunt for anyone.

Blaming myself for not have giving Joseph all he wanted from me, I decided to correct my mistake. With my next partner I dropped my barriers, and with those after, I gave it all carelessly (feelings and dick).

David: My story with David was short and sweet. We had an instant crush and became lovers 20 minutes after we met. David’s mentality was beyond open and gave zero fucks to anyone or anything. He was an extroverted and got me used to public affection.

I experienced a new type of relationship with him, an open one! But it was the best for our situation and his double life… He was an escort.

The song below reminds me of him, not only because we played a lot when chilling, but also because he made me lose shyness and feel comfortable with myself. A bit like the end of this video.

I had a lot of fun with David he was a good guy in essence, but he loved trouble too much. Ironically he called ME “bad boy” which actually made sense, I was his type! Since I couldn’t handle his double life and knowing that relationships were born to die, I just enjoyed every moment we had.

After our breakup we remained friends and he used to come visit me after classes, but by then I had someone else and at some point we lost contact.

He was obsessed with the song above and played it all the time. Probably because it described well both of us.


PatrickA: PatrickA was my fascination. The contrast of my intense previous relationships… But that was not always a good thing… especially during sex… ’cause we never protected ourselves.

For some reason I never wore a condom with him, not even the first time we met. More alarming was the fact that he never asked a single question. And much more alarming the fact I DIDN’T CARE!

Losing Joseph changed a lot in me, and while I never took that risk with him (which created some issues ’cause he wanted raw) with PatrickA I went there all the way not caring anymore about myself.

Ironically, my bond with PatrickA was mostly cerebral and his brilliance mesmerised me.Yet, nobody has ever kissed me the way he did. PatrickA was not only genius, he also he had the body of a Greek God.

He could be the sweetest, the most perverted, the most geeky, nerdy, but also the most bipolar. PatrickA was not openly gay and having developed feelings for me also developed issue in his head. Despite that we lived a normal couple’s life, waking up next to each other almost daily.

 

I adored PatrickA and accepted him as he was, but eventually someone more determine came to my life (Xavier) wanting to give me what I started missing. And I chose to put myself first.

As most of my ex’s we stayed in good-terms, and the last time I saw him was early this year when he apologised to me for the times he acted like a dick during our relationship.

The song below played during one of our best afternoons together during spring, and always reminds of me of that moment with him.

Chater IV coming soon…. (I’m such a whore!) 

Happy 71st Birthday, CHER!

For most of us, Cher has just always been there, like the Statue of Liberty in sequins. She is larger-than-life and beloved by generations for always speaking her mind with wit and honesty, whether that’s in a candid interview or on Twitter.

To celebrate Cher’s 71st birthday today, I present a curated collection of Cher’s best quotes.

  • On clothes: “Going hungry never bothered me — it was having no clothes.”
  • On relationships: “If grass can grow through cement, love can find you at every time in your life.”
  • On her gay fans: “I think that the longer I look good, the better gay men feel.”
  • On her legacy: “I am a part of history whether people want to take it seriously or not.”
  • On ageing: “Nobody dislikes my age more than me. I can’t help it that I’ve been here this long.”
  • On men: “Men aren’t necessities. They’re luxuries.”

If I close my eyes you´re the only one I see.

Love her!!!

#SaveTogether

Endangered Species Day was yesterday, and to celebrate this all-too-important day, Photo Ark, one of National Geographic’s many prized projects—has teamed up with the Outdoor Advertising Association of America to present a cute, cuddly, and critical campaign.

Aptly titled #SaveTogether, the movement calls attention to species whose futures are uncertain…

Thanks to the amount of responsibility men has (ALL OF IT!) on the extinction of all these wonderful creatures.

Such a crime!

The #SaveTogether campaign relies on a combination of social media and good, old-fashioned signage to educate and engage the public before we all lamented the disappearance of the animal kingdom.

Elephants, rhinos and all the rest of majestic living creatures need us to fix our abominable behaviour. This planet is home of ALL of us!

The A(sian) Gene

Yesterday someone asked me if I was Asian… I found it funny, even though, it’s not the first time somebody asked me that. In fact those few asking me that question have a good sense of observation..

 Not because I am Asian, but I guess they can see something of my family background on my physical traits (whatever it is) ’cause there’s no other explanation for that question.

If you see some of my cousins (picture above), a lot of them look more Asian mixed. And if you ever see some of my uncles, my mom (when she was younger) or my grandma, well, then you’ll understand.

I believe my maternal grandmother had very strong genes since she was Chinese descent for what I know. My grandfather was mulatto.

In my particular case my dad is mestizo (and his mother is half-French), so I guess I’m a mixed of all that but I got more of the guys genes unlike my female cousins.

Anyhow I hardly get impressed by people, but observation is a great quality and more than amused I was admired by the person who made that remark.