Every 13th…

She comes to my mind sporadically, in a dream or as a flashback out of nowhere.

Today marks 1 year and 4 months that my baby girl (Mo) died.

In her last days, I used to play (and sing) a song to her called Loquita (crazy little girl, or naughty girl… the latest in this case)

And while I sang to her the happy song, my eyes got watery whenever I said “mamita” (part of the lyrics of the song that can translate as little girl or sexy girl) because I knew she was dying… and I used to call her that way.

Tonight my boy Sai Sai and I walked in her memory.

My sweatest girl, mamita. I miss you!

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Hasta La Proxima

On my last day in Lima I went breakfast with my cousin and an aunt I haven’t seen in 26 years.

This aunt is the ex-wife of one of my mom’s brothers and it’s a lady I love deeply ’cause she’s one of the few people that never made me feel different when I was a kid.

The last time I saw her I was 14 year old, she moved to Venezuela for business, me to Canada and I never heard from her again until recently that she left Venezuela due to the situation and moved back to Lima.

So, we spent the morning having breakfast and during the afternoon my cousin took me to the historic downtown.

However it was a mess and many important streets were closed due to some manifestation, so we only went to one of the many churches to visit the Catacombs…  Because nothing says SUICIDAL than walking underground tunnels of a 1700s Franciscan monastery filled with skulls and bones in a city of EARTHQUAKES!!

Later, my cousin took me to eat before we said goodbye (she’s doing another master and couldn’t skip classes, so her driver took me to the airport). Now, I kinda feel bad for her…

See, all my cousins are professionals, most are engineers, few doctors and she’s an architect. She was always very intelligent and ambitious; and she’s one of the top bosses in her company. She’s very successful in her professional life, but not so much in the personal area.

The role of wife and mother is not for her…

I realized she’s not in love with her husband, and when I asked her she comfirmed my suspicion.

She’s with him (for now) mostly for their baby, and this may sound ridiculous but over there one of the requirements for (“good”) schools to accept a kid is that the parents are married.

And that type of dumb mentality (influenced by centuries of catholic church dominance,) my friends, is what makes of modern South America a 3rd world country!

Anyhow, I believe in my cousin’s common sense.

Back in the airport, waiting to board my plane I was thinking about my life and how easy everything would be with my cousins (a.k.a my best friends) around me. Not only as motivation and inspiration, but as joy.

The bad moments won’t be so hard, the breakups won’t be so painful.

Friends make everything better!

On that note… Hasta la proxima South America.

LIMA

I arrived to Lima yesterday, here I have less family and I’m staying at another cousin’s  mini “penthouse”.  

Unlike Santa Cruz, Lima is a lot more insecure, the city is a lot bigger and so all houses and buildings have jail-like security systems. From electric fences to private security gates and all the stuff that sounds unthinkable in Canada.

I arrived at cold-grey Lima at 7 AM and my first request was breakfast, so my cousin took me straight to a breakfast restaurant.

I seriously felt like a king in this trip. My cousins and family pleased any whim I had… But in South America the poor is really poor and the rich is really rich, and I’m fortunate my relatives enjoy a good living.

And despite the fact that my life could be a lot more luxurious here in South America, I won’t change the peace I have in Canada for anything. 

I miss my dog and my lovers already. I had enough vacations and I can’t wait to go back home and MY GYM!!!!  

Overindulged

I have no words of gratitude for my cousins they overindulged me during all my trip, they kind of make me feel like if I were their child… the wealthiest particularly. 

Everyone has showered me with presents since day 1, but her thing is almost daily. She’s truly rich!

From the dentist to expensive beauty products, treatments and stuff, to her latest gift: A sport Prada bag, backpack and a shoulder one.

I got clear that I have to go back to my rat hole, but at least now I have motivation and future plans.

My cousins made me realise that my real call is anything related to beauty and one of them propose me to open a business whenever I’m ready for it. For once, it got me thinking.

I loved my trip to Santa Cruz (Bolivia,) seen my family gave me the hope I no longer had (not to mention the people here is very good looking) and because of that I made a tattoo with the word faith in Spanish (). 

I gotta say it hurt me like hell! 

I’m taking my plane in few hours. Next destination, Lima.

Hello From the 3rd World

I can finally update, I’m still on vacations and I haven’t stop since I took that plane… I had invitations for breakfast, dinner and supper and other activities since I landed… No rest whatsoever, but my family is fucking AMAZING!!!

For once my joy doesn’t rely on sex. 

Back in Montreal I only have my parents and I live alone, I don’t have relatives so I got used to not have this type of affection and attention; I have replaced what I missed for lovers and carnal pleasure ’cause it’s the easiest way to cover up what your heart lacks.

My cousins are my best friends, my sisters, and my uncles and aunts just like parents. They have spoiled me incredibly since I arrived and I’m going to miss soooo much living large.

My cousins want me to stay and find me a rich guy, so I may have a date tonight or tomorrow with one of their friends haha my cousins are awesome!!

I have few more days over here… I’m going to cry so much leaving my family and the good life.

But for now, let’s enjoy the last few days! 

My Ex’s > Yours!

This morning picking up my baby from his other daddy’s house, my married ex (Bunny) gave me a present.

I was like“Is it my bday?”…  “No it’s not you silly!” he said. Awww how random and sweet of Bunny.

He gave me a body lotion ’cause nothing says keep your shit fresh like some Lanvin body lotion. He clearly cares for my beauty!

I feel truly blessed to have the best ex boyfriends (I chose them right!) and I don’t know if in the world exist someone who loves his ex’s as much as me. But if they do, they’re awesome too.

Despite the many years of our “end” most of them have stayed in touch, but 3 of them remain particularly close showing me love in different ways. When they’re not buying me a Condo, they’re giving me cute presents. Yet, no present in life is more valuable than their unconditionally friendship.

And that’s probably the BEST PROOF that once, I was a really great guy.