Tag Archives: Selfies

Remembrances Of Him

Last night, Antoine slept over for the first time

Usually I don’t allow my assorted flings such privilege, but he’s kind of more serious than the rest.

So he arrived, we played, we got wet and we spooned the whole night.

Antoine is very docile and easy going, and from times he reminds me of Joseph (one of my ex’s). His coolness and his body.

Although I was in love with Joseph I was also addicted to him. Sex with Joseph was my drug and many other things not all my lovers made me feel.

Similarities aside, Antoine is light years away from Joseph when it comes to sex… But nothing I can’t fix tho, after all Joseph was a virgin when we met.

What Antoine needs is to trust and let himself go, and what I need is patience.

But the truth is I don’t really know what I want with him. All I know is that it makes me feel a lot better being the one in charge.

Not to mention he also gives me a déjà vu of happier times.

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I enjoy my relative anonymity on this blog, without it I won’t be able to talk about the sex stuff and fuckups I’ve so far accomplished.

This blog is the friend I lack and allows me the freedom to be who I am without judgement based on what I look like, which colours so many of my real life and virtual interactions.

Although I’ve shared my blog with few of my ex’s (when we were together) before I got L.A.I.D (Launched Into A Depressive Spiral) I know that far from judging me they understand that sex is my way to cope with the void they left when they walked away.

However, aside from them I do appreciate being “incognito”.

In the world of overexposure that we live, where people (and assorted maniacs) can find all your info (and the apps you use) easily through your email or phone number, I value my privacy.

As a matter of fact, Matias found out my Instagram some weeks ago…

Obviously he started to check my life and my ex’s lives as well, which I didn’t appreciate because I’m very protective of those I love.

So, basically I lost my cool with him because the limit of my chillness is the invasion of my sensibility. Next step? I closed my Instagram.

I don’t need that any of the guys I fuck with know more than my naked body.

My sex is public but not my feelings. Those are private and exclusive.

This blog is all I have left but unlike the rest, here you only see what I want to show and nothing more. Besides, I can’t just quit and go private here because expressing my misbehaviour is therapeutic. Also, that would mean I can’t quote myself in a post about myself! Really, I’m that narcissistic.

In short, half of my privacy may have a face. But my better-half is just for myself.

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Music Asks

Since I can’t live without music, this is probably my favourite Tumbrl asks.

1. Your current favourite song: Secret by Karl Wolf
2. A song that used to be your favourite, but now you don’t like: Somebody That I Used To Know by Gotye
3. A song that used to be your favorite that you still like: Creep by Radiohead
4. A song that you’re embarrassed to like: None
5. A song that reminds you of another period in your life: Only Love Strangers by Faye Wong
6. A song that helped you through a difficult time in your life: Locked Out Of Heaven by Bruno Mars
7. A song from a genre you don’t usually listen to: Need You Now by Lady Antubelum
8. A song you loved when you were a little kid: Bizarre Love Triangle by New Order
9. A song you loved 5 years ago: So many good songs back then. From Miss A and Marina and The Diamonds to Elva Hsiao, but I’m sharing this one below by Miguel (’cause I met Joseph around the time I was obsessed with this song, and like the song, he became my drug).

10. A song that reminds you of your childhood: Disco Samba by Two Men Sound
11. A song that reminds you of your best friend: Puedes Contar Conmigo by La Oreja de Van Gogh
12. A song that reminds you of someone that hurt you: Diamonds by Rihanna
13. A song that reminds you of your current partner/crush: None
14. A song that reminds you of an ex: My Dilemma by Selena Gomez
15. A song that makes you want to fall in love: I don’t know
16. A song that makes you want to cry: At this point no song has that effect of me, although it touches me this piano cover by one of my ex’s (Hubby) that I recorded over the phone one random night when he called me. We were already ex’s by then and I had two more boyfriends after him. Now, I’ve deeply loved all my ex’s but none of the rest ever showed me the amount of love and sincere care that Hubby showed (still show) to me… 

17. A song that makes you want to slay your enemies: Bring The Noize by M.I.A
18. A song that reminds you of a place you’ve been: En La Obscuridad by Belinda
19. A song that you’ve seen performed live: Bad Romance by Lady Gaga
20. A song that you’ve listened to on repeat recently: Reggaeton Lento by CNCO ft Little Mix
21. Your top most played song on iTunes: Remember Me by Hanz Zimmer (actually an instrumental)

22. A song that motivates you to work/helps you focus: None
23. A song from the soundtrack of your favourite video game/movie/TV show: Fantino by Sebastien Tellier (another instrumental)
24. A song that you think is really overrated: Hello by Adele
25. A song that you think has an important message: Love One Another by Amber
26. A song that reminds you of your favourite fictional character: Cobra by Yoko Maeno
27. A song that best describes your personality: None
28. A song that represents “your aesthetic”: No idea
29. A song that cheers you up when you’re sad: Any salsa song.
30. A song from a band that you’ve grown up loving: Only Takes A Minute by Take That
31. A song that you want to cover (regardless of how much talent you have) Romanza by Andrea Bocelli
32. A song that you listened to ironically, but now you genuinely love: Shake It Off by Taylor Swift
33. A song whose message you don’t like: No idea
34. Your favourite song that’s a cover of another song: Always On My Mind by Pet Shop Boys
35. A song that sends chills down your spine: Chandelier by Sia #StoryOfMyLife
36. A song that you think is underrated: ALL Jhene Aiko’s songs

37. A song that you work out to: 212 by Azelia Banks
38. A song that best describes your current emotion: Sex Therapy by Robin Thicke
39. Your favourite instrumental (no lyrics/singing) song: Adagio by Secret Garden
40. A song by a band from your hometown: L’amour Est Un Monstre by Misteur Valaire
41. A song from the year you were born: Just The Way you Are by Bily Joel
42. Your favourite “old” song (pre-90s) 99 Red Balloons by Nena
43. A song that makes you laugh: Not sure
44. A song from your favourite musical: Les Rois Du Monde by Philippe d’Avilla, Damien Sargue et Grégori
45. Your favourite Disney song: Beauty and the Beast by Celine Dion & Peabo Bryson
46. A song that you wish more people knew about: Hatefuck by Cruel Youth

47. A song that you love to dance to: MANY
48. A song that you can’t help but sing along: A Little Respect by Erasure
49. A song whose lyrics you have memorised: Strani Amore by Laura Pausini
50. Free slot! Any song you want to share! THIS

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Bed & Breakfast

I don’t have the energies to make a proper post today, Randy left me exhausted last night and I woke up early to work… ZzZzz.

See, sex with Randy is always awesome but sometimes he absorbs all my energies ’cause he’s one of those guys who take forever to ejaculate. 

I mean, no one has ever fucked me as long as Victor did our first time (he can fuck for hours,) but the difference between Randy and Victor is the girth of their penis (which makes a big difference when you’re getting pounded because, Ouch!) and Randy’s dick is thicker than Victor’s… Exactly, my poor tight hole!

Anyhow sex was great as usual, yet it would never be as great as the time I spend with those that mean much more to me.

And earlier, one of my ex’s took me for breakfast.

Seriously, I always need to get laid but my heart also needs to get laid, and seeing my ex’s do the job to me. At least in the waiting for the right next guy.

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Evolution Of A Downfall

Behind my insensitive slut facade there’s a hurt soul that crumbles in pieces at the sound of a familiar melody… And I hate it!

I’ve already cry for love when I was young that now, in the end of my existence,  if you don’t like hickeys or ass grabbing we are a NO!

By that I mean I’m done with deep feelings.

Unfortunately we all have a past and shit is stronger, so whenever I hear a song that reminds me of a special period in time (with any of the guys I’ve loved,) the wounds open a bit and.. well… it sucks!

So I had my laptop playing music at random while doing some chores, when a song I haven’t heard in ages started playing… #FML

You may find it ridiculous but for many years I avoided to listen songs I used to love because of the memories (mostly happy with few exceptions).

I firmly believe in “out of sight, out of mind” and “what you don’t know won’t hurt you;” and I’ve applied them many times for my sanity (and I still do).

The same goes with music.

When it comes to overcome heartbreaks, ignorance is bliss! Below the evolution of my downfall. 3 songs I relate and remind me of so many things:

This whole blog is just a conversation I am having with myself.

And needed to take it out.

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Emojis 👀👌 Asks

I wish I could be the person I want to be but I’m too tired, so below more Tumbrl asks.

☝ – How tall are you? 5’10
✔ – Sexual Orientation: Asexual clearly because, VIRGIN!
🚬 – Do you Smoke? Eww NO!
🍷 – Do you Drink? Socially.
♒ – Do you Take Drugs? I have never done a drug in my life.
😳 – Age you get mistaken for? 27/28
💉 – Have Tattoos? Yes.
✏️ – Want any tattoos? Yes.
✂️ – Got any Piercings? Used to.
✌ – Want any piercings? Yes.
👌 – Best friend? Two of my ex’s.
♥ – Do you like anyone? Always do.
📝 – Story from your childhood. A crazy woman (like asylum crazy) slapped me in the middle of the street on my home after school when I was 10.
💬 – I wish… I wouldn’t have to wish.
‼️ – Something you’ll change? Myself.
💦 – What makes you horny? Nerds
🌟 – A wish you’ll wish for? You!
🔥 – Something spicy you like? I don’t eat spicy.
👃 You hate the smell of …. Smokers.
👊 – Something you hate? Bad smells.
🚶 – Are you single? Surprisingly.
💬 – Can we text? Only if we sext!
💍 – Marry me? Let’s do it! 
💘 – Be my tumblr crush? Anytime!
🎥 – Top 5 favourite movies?


✏ – Random fact about yourself. I eat two eggs every single morning.
✈️ – Where are you from?  South America.
🚀 – Where do you wanna visit? Asia.
🙈 – What makes you shy? Compliments
💃 – Can you dance? WATCH ME!!
💏 – Do you love anyone? Yes.
🌴 – A island you would visit? Hong Kong.
🌎 – A country you would visit? Singapore.
🌀 – Favorited type of weather? Any weather is good holding someone’s hand.
📅 – Favourite time of the year? October.
🚔 – Have you ever been arrested? Errr… Next question!!
🚑 – Have you ever driven in an ambulance before? No.
🚼 – Do you have or want kids? I wanted.
🐶 – Do you own a pet? Yes.
😔 – Something that makes you sad? Rain.
😈 – Are you a freak? Only in bed.
💪 – Do you work out? Yes.

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HELLO October!! I love you! My real love and favourite month of the year is here. 

October not only brings back the beautiful red & yellow landscape, or keeps my laptop playing on repeat the cult “Mean Girls” and “The Rocky Horror Picture Show,”  it also brings back the most important day of the year: SLUTOWEEN HALLOWEEN! Because Halloween > Xmas!

Halloween is my favourite day in the calendar because I simply love how people loses all  shame, taste and dignity to enjoy that day without restrictions.

For several years now I’ve been attending house Halloween parties, and the last few at the same place… This year I want to go somewhere else.

Maybe make some trash friends somehow ’cause trash Halloween parties are the best! 

Many years ago I used to have a gay coworker that was a party animal and his friends were pretty trash. He invited me to a party and OMG it was amazing.

Drunk humans on costumes everywhere acting messy but fun… 

Okay let me say it again, GAY trash Halloween parties are the BEST! 

And what’s the easiest way to look for a party? Facebook!! Ugh!

My Facebook it’s been closed for over two years, but I think it’s time to re-open it and reconnect with normal people again (normal people = people I don’t have sex with) I can already see the tons of messages on my wall asking “Where have you been?” 

OMG NO! I refuse to re-open my Facebook. 

Anyhow, below few snaps over the years.

I have no idea what to wear this year but for sure something that covers my body.

I know, it sounds lame and full of clothes, but any self-respecting whore knows that Halloween is amateur hour… See, Halloween is the only time authentic sluts cover their parts up ’cause they have the other 364 days of the year to do otherwise.

That been said, I have no clue what to do yet but; I cannot wait!!

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