Tag Archives: Sex Talk

Shit Sequels Say

Sorry for the lack of updates, between work, errands and fornication I had no energies to blog. But today is another day and I’m off at last.

I’m in the wrong realm and I think everyone can tell.

Now…

I’ve learned enough watching sequels of romantic comedies (or sequels in general) that the sequels of romantic comedies are complete wastes of romance and my humour.

Take Bridget Jone’s Diary. The first film was fine because it hit the right tone of humour, irony, sarcasm, humiliation, and heartbreak which is what a good romance is.

Then there’s the Edge of Reason, the sequel to the Golden Globe nominated film which was so bad, even the sheep in my dreams had bruises.

And there’s also Aladdin 2, or some other sort of stupidity that completely destroys the fantasy of happy endings.

The message is simple: there are no happy endings, but shitty sequels.

Life isn’t that much different…

After a while, some of us, looking for that end, turned into a shitty sequel of ourselves.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that Alex seems confused with my attitude. The fact that I gave him another chance to hang out didn’t mean exclusivity. He thought we would be dating like before, but even if his penis pleasures me, his personality doesn’t.

A sequel won’t be the best idea simply because, I do not trust him.

Perhaps I am the issue…

When I was young and pure, after my 7 years relationship (Hubby) I got into a relationship with the next guy I met (Bunny). After that breakup (Bunny) it took me 2 guys before I met my next boyfriend (Jaden).

After that bf (Jaden), it took me 8 guys before I met the next one (Joseph).

Once over (Joseph) it took me 4 to meet the next (David). After him (David,) it took me only 1 (PatrickA). And after that one, 1 again. (Xavier)

It’s been over 50 guys since my last bf, and I still haven’t met the next one.

I AM a shitty sequel!!!

See, it’s not my intention to make Alex feel stupid, but he should be grateful I accepted to fuck again ’cause I had the choice to say:

“I wish you never acted like an asshole so I could have some faith in you.”

My other choice was to leave the space below his message blank, like he left mine.

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French Connection

Something went wrong with Sébastien over the weekend, I’m not sure what got into him, but I had no time to think about it. While he disappeared someone else found me, Julien.

Julien is an 18 yo French studying in Montreal. He’s very tall (6’4) and has a massive 8″ F.A.T dick. The thickest penis I’ve ever take, which I never thought it would be possible. 

Since Alex went to Quebec for the weekend, Sébastien got weird, and I was not in the mood to see Randy, I was resigned to spend my Saturday night alone.

But the gods had other plans, and they sent Julien.

Julien insisted so much to see me that I didn’t have the heart to break his young heart (I’m full of love,) but little did I know he would be the one breaking me with all DAT!

Julien acted mesmerised and his “t’es magnifique” only put more pressure on me.

However, we connected so well that I allowed him to stay. He seemed so excited to spend the night with me and inside me that we barely slept. 

This morning before leaving he kissed me… “T’es beau” he said, like all the rest… 

And like the rest I knew our fate. 

So, with a smile I looked into his eyes and only said… Take care!

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Forgiven

Alex wanted to apologise and so I saw him last night. In my head good memories > bad memories. Plus, he’s my sexual type.

To be honest I didn’t expect anything to happen, but since nothing is set on stone with Sébastien I’m not missing any chance.

Alex is a black sheep, a Russian roulette, the epitome of “bad boy,” but he somehow manages to control his misdemeanour with me. In part due to my zero bullshit tolerance, in part to get to my ass.

He may be of messy nature, but he’s not stupid. And regarding myself, I’m just kinky AF!

That said, we ejaculated last night.

Alex is a very efficient fuck, and he was forgiven for all his wrongs.

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Decapitated Male Mantis Still Fucks

Everybody knows that sometimes a lady praying mantis gets into some horrific 8mm shit by killing and eating their male fuck partner during sex.

The Daily Mail have posted a video of a dude praying mantis still giving his lady that praying mantis dick after she bit his head off.

And I’m sharing the video with you, because we’re friends and I wouldn’t be a friend if I didn’t show you a video of a lady praying mantis doing sex to a dead body.

Deep Look, a science series from PBS, says that lady praying mantises are much bigger and stronger than the dude ones, and they don’t partake in cannibalism.They do it, because being knocked up with so many eggs takes a lot out of them, and eating another praying mantis gives them strength.

The ladies are also able to produce twice the amount of eggs if they eat the dude. Also, praying mantises rarely make it through the winter, so the dudes don’t have much to lose. Some of them might figure that they’re going to go to Jesus soon anyway, so they may as well try to bust a nut even if it means getting eaten (and not in a sexy way).  

And as shown in the video below, the dude can sometimes keep boning even if he’s got no head. This brings new meaning to the phrase “fuck your brains out.

At around the 3:00 mark, a lady praying mantis bites off the dude praying mantis’ head and he keeps doing her. The Deep Look narrator says that because of the nerves in his stomach, he can still get the job done.

The next time your fuckbuddy can’t get it up, because he’s drunk or whatever, show him this video. A dude praying mantis can still do it decapitated, so there’s no excuse!!

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Too Early For Rough Sex

Sorry for the lack of updates I’ve been pretty busy doing plenty of things, one of them, dating!

For some reason my writing skills suck on daylight, but by midnight (the time I usually blog) I’m barely awake and too tired to make sense.That said, it’s past midnight, let’s try again…

Tuesday night Jeff asked me to go to his place, since he lives relatively close to mine I went, we met, we kissed, but nothing more. Despite being good looking and only 22, I was not attracted by his personality (horny chats not always match the horny) he acted like a grandpa, too sober and not fun… I was bored! I didn’t really stay too long. By the time I was about to leave, he was already horny touching my private parts.

Although I let him kiss me, it was a kiss goodbye. Someone who doesn’t turn me on the first time won’t turn me on at all. Simple as that.

Wednesday Randy wanted to fuck me, but I had a date with Sébastien.

And there was Sébastien…“Je regrette ne pas t’avoir rencontré avant” (I regret not having  met you before) was the first thing he said. 

Sébastien was very sweet, very attractive, very interesting, fun, and very into me. The whole night he showered me with compliments and talked in plural (including me in his future activities and plans,) while I just listened cynical to his enthusiasm. 

At some point he asked me when was the last time I went out? And when I answered he said “Je vais m’occuper de toi, tu ne seras plus seul” (I’m gonna take care of you, you won’t be alone anymore…) Giving me a hopeless flashback of last years’ summer when walking down the hill of the Mont Royal, Xavier grabbed my hand and also said to me “You’re not alone anymore.”

Later on we lost our clothes and there was plenty of tongue, but no intercourse.

Sébastien in bed was nice, but pretty vanilla. And even though we were very comfortable together, it was too early for me to ask him more aggressiveness and freak him out. But soon he’ll know I like it rough.

I like Sébastien a lot, and I like the fact that at his 25 he has already experienced an intense life (marriage and divorce included). I’m not saying he’s settle, but he’s not on a journey of self-discovering like most younger guys. He seems to know what works for him.

By the end of the night, he asked me to spend the weekend together and I accepted. I guess only then I’ll see how serious he want us to be.

But in the waiting, I’m fucking with Randy tonight.

Because if there’s one thing I learnt is that you cannot believe in men.

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Another Day, Another Man…

Because being a male’s magnet is clearly what I do best… I don’t know, it seems like I’m the gods spoiled child by getting the attention of the new generation.

Jeff is one of the new guys that contacted me over the weekend, probably also the only one that seems to want something more than turn me into a sissy hypno (like some other young maniacs plan for me,) which is refreshing ’cause feeling desired is frustrating when nothing follows.

It’s like a fast-cummer, all blah blah until they cum 2 minutes later and you’re left undone.

Jeff is pretty hot (kind of reminds me of a younger Guillaume [another guy from my past]) and not only physically but his attitude is. By that I mean that even though ageism is very strong in the gay culture I never felt that in his approach, he seems sincerely careless about it. I’m conscious that all these guy after me are over 15 years younger than I, but I also know that my relative good shape and “pretty face” weights more to them.

In many cases I was a big exception to their usual taste. #ExcuseMybeauty

That said, Phil and Sébastien better watch it ’cause applications for my next guy aren’t closed yet, and Jeff is a strong contender in this game where many burn. Especially me.

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Perfect Percentage

Day off at last! I can finally blog during day time and not past midnight barely alive.

Since Adam became history last week, I’m in talks with several guys, as usual, because, of course! 

Someone told me once that we have to keep on walking because we never know what’s around the corner, it might be just another guy, the imperfect guy you kinda like, the imperfect guy you do like, the perfect guy who doesn’t like you, or the perfect guy who likes you.

And here’s a dose of reality, most often, about 95% of the time, the next person is just another guy. Easily forgettable like a white t-shirt.  

The Imperfect guy you kinda like is about 2% of the time. He’s like uncomfortable tight pants. You wear them because they look good on you, but you know, deep down, you only wear them to show off.

The Imperfect guy you do like is about 1%. You don’t really agree with everything he has to say, with how he looks like, but he has a certain something that attracts you to him and you deal with it. Most of us probably end up with this type of guy.

Then there’s the perfect guy who doesn’t like you, that comes in your life at about 1% of the time. He is a custom made suit. Everything about him fits perfectly with you. The creases on his face when he smiles, the texture of his hair, his body, everything seems great. The problem is that to this guy you’re a size too large or a size too small, not a custom made.

And the perfect guy who likes you comes at approximately 1% of the time. He’s not just a custom made suit, that’s your skin and fits perfectly with him.

That said, I saw Randy last night and he ravaged my ass!

He is a great lover to whoever has an asshole of steel (or a super lose one) ’cause he’s the type of guy you have to beg him to ejaculate… Which I did ’cause I was exhausted, and at some point it was no longer fun but painful.

To be honest, I don’t need him. But I’m used to his company.

I guess Randy is that imperfect guy you kinda like

But instead of pants, the only tight thing here is my ass.

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