Tag Archives: Xmas

LIVE OF THE DAY: XMAS EDITION

Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) by Michael Bublé

Especially For You by GODDESS Kylie Minogue

Symphony by Clean Bandit 

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There are some things that money can’t buy…

Since mostly everything was closed this morning, Hubby (aka Bello) and I decided to Dim Sum. But first he gave me a present… A prepaid credit card! #YAAAS

Jesus I love my ex’s!! 

As usual, time with Hubby is full quality. Being with him feels so natural and while I remain the same expressive person, he’s sometimes tense when my Latin blood gets too affectionate or in-your-face, so it’s funny to see him kind of nervous when he can’t stop me from saying something “scandalous” or do something sweet. 

But again, Asians have another nature and he’s no longer used to me.

Still we had a good time, and he invited me to dinner on Wednesday.

A Christmas dinner organised by his friends. Friends that were also mine when we were a couple, so it’s going to be very nice to see them all again.

In short, I’m sooo Boxing Day tomorrow.

There are some things that money can’t buy… for everything else, there’s… VISA, bitches!

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Merry Xmas

MERRY CHRISTMAS you naughty readers of my nonsense! 

As every year, I hope this post finds you happy, healthy, and surrounded by those you love… it could be your family, partner, booty call, pet friend, a pillow, a bottle of whatever you drink to handle life (and if that’s the case you probably need help!) or your shadow… the only faithful bitch that will stick with you to the end.

And may Santa bring you everything you’ve asked for, unless you were a jerk ’cause jerks are not cool.

As for myself I spent the evening with my dad and my bro. As usual I had to dress up, which I totally hate.

However it was a good excuse to wear a ring Hubby (one of my ex’s) bought me in Prague many years ago. Not only is a beautiful piece but it’s also meaningful to me ’cause he was the guy I spent more years with and the man I thought I will marry… Whom by the way I’m seeing this morning ’cause he’s taking me brunch.

Told you my ex’s are awesome! 

And speaking of… I received a text from Xavier (my last boyfriend) last night. 


I was actually surprised to see his message  because I didn’t expect to hear from him again.

And not because we had any drama but because guys not often value shit, and are so full of it… Regardless, it was sweet and a nostalgic déjà vu… As last year, PatrickA (my ex before Xavier) also messaged me on Christmas Eve.
 
Anyhow, later on I’m spending the rest of my day like this:


Because nothing say Christmas like getting your sparkly ass spanked! Yeah I haven’t fuck in 3 days and I’m totally due to unwrap some “gift.” 

That been said,  Merry Xmas again! Wishing you all joy, peace and health. 

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Viral Christmas Cards

When comedian John Cessna was away for school during the 2008 holiday season, his mom called to inform him that he would be missing their family’s Christmas photo.

She jokingly suggested to “sober up” and send out his own Christmas cards.

Like an obedient son, Cessna followed his mother’s instructions and has been creating his own Christmas cards ever since. However, it’s probably safe to say that it turned out to be not what his mom had in mind… Everything began with a few bottles, but lately John has been focusing more on absurdity and insidiousness. 

Below 2015,2016 and 2017. The best of them.

2015

2016

2017

2015 and 2016 ”Trump names Claus Attorney General” are EPIC! Absolutely brilliant. 

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Genius Lazy Christmas Ideas

It’s December already and people all around the world are decorating like crazy. From hundreds of fairy lights hung on people’s houses, to meticulously decorated Christmas trees, everyone is pressured to put up at least something.

But what if you’re too lazy to do anything though still want to bring just a little Christmas spirit into your home? Well, check below…

If you are searching for super easy ways to be lazy, this is how it’s done!!

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Christmas Sex Elf

For those of you who want some fap inspiration for Christmas this year, here’s Domenico Vaccaro pole dancing to Mimi while dressed as an elf. 

Domenico is an acrobat and pole dancer who obviously can’t resist a holiday theme when it comes to his act.

He posted vid of himself on Instagram pole dancing to All I Want For Christmas while dressed as an elf.

Domenico really knows how to work those crushed velvet pantaloon.

Domenico’s efforts should be applauded except for one aspect of his performance. That damn song. You can’t go anywhere without that damn song playing.

You can’t go to the mall. You can’t turn on the TV.

You can’t make funeral arrangements for your grandma at the mortuary. You can’t even go to sleep because it plays in your dreams for the entirety of December.

And speaking of sex gods, Maxime is missing me I guess…

All of the sudden December seems right!

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The two gay Josephs

Jesus was technically the original star of My Two Dads (his two dads being God and Joseph), but someone in Los Angeles took his story one step further and gay’d it up by putting a gaytivity scene on their lawn.

Comedian Cameron Esposito tweeted a picture of the two Josephs and a Jesus that her neighbour decorated their front yard with for Christmas.

Either this Jesus was truly a miracle, or their surrogate (Mary) is missing. Also missing is the Three Queens bringing gifts for Baby Jesus (an I Heart My Dads onesie and Celine Dion’s lullaby album).

One of Cameron’s Twitter followers shared her own gaytivity scene starring two lesbian Marys and a Baby Jesus in a strapless rainbow dress thing

Of course, some religious types, like the Roman Catholic Bishop of Providence, are throwing holy water at that sacrilegious sight and calling it an attack on the Christian faith!

Yes, a harmless nativity scene is helping to destroy the Christian faith, but not protecting children who have been raped by priests isn’t. #BurnBitch

Okay, but you know, I too am concerned for that plastic Jesus, and not because he’s got two dads. I’m concerned because he’s got two parents who look like twins!

They’re the kind of couple who say, “Wha? Us? Naw!”, when you tell them that they’ve been together so long they are starting to look like each other.

But who cares about my dumb opinion when Fabulous Jesus approves…

YAAAS Jesus!!! 

We Catholics definitely have much more fun!! (Ps. But don’t tell my mom)

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